Category: gyms

Episode 48 of Winter Dreams by Ken David Stewart

Episode 48:

“I’m really starting to hate the fact that my boyfriend is the Cougars star goalie.” Misty said.

“Why?” Sabrina asked.

“It’s those damn hockey wives. They are such a clique. The worst of the whole bunch is Linda Saunders. She’s been spreading horrible rumours about Rick and I.” She’s just jealous that Rick’s a much better goalie than her boyfriend Miles,” Misty replied.

“What kind of rumours?” Peyton asked. All three friends could now sit on the park bench as Peyton had cleared off enough snow.

“Linda’s been telling the other girls that Rick and I are heavy stoners and that I’m a slut,” Misty answered.

“That is bad,” Sabrina said.

“Now that Linda has told the other hockey wives the rumours are starting to spread through the whole school,” Misty said and began to sob.

Peyton leaned over towards Misty. I’ve got an idea. Do you know Gordon Zender, our band’s security manager?”

“I don’t really know him, but I think I’ve seen him at band parties,” Misty answered stifling her sobs.

“So you’ve seen Gordon and know what he looks like. We call Gordon, Godzilla for a reason. He’s six foot four and weighs around two hundred seventy pounds. Most of it is muscle. He works out at the Iron Works gym three to four times a week. Before our band hired him, Gordon was a bouncer at the LaSalle Hotel. The LaSalle used to be a rough place with lots of fights, especially on the weekends. That all stopped a few days after they hired Godzilla as a bouncer.







goalie 7

Episode 47 of Winter Dreams by Ken David Stewart

Episode 47:

“Why did you call Misty his slut girlfriend?” Cindy demanded.

“Because she is. I got that information from Rudy too. He told me that he saw Misty with some freak called Gypsy at The Lake Mariposa Rock Festival. Rudy says that Misty loves drugged out hippy guys. She’ll sleep with anyone she meets. Before Rick, Misty was dating this grease ball called Jim. Jim is such a slime ball that he used to beat up Misty regularly.”

Just then Miss Redding, the gym teacher, broke in on the discussion and ordered the girls to hurry and get on the gym floor before she started handing out detentions.

As soon as Miss Redding’s back was turned Misty escaped through the back exit door of the girls’ locker room.  With tears streaming down her face, Misty ran to her favorite local park about three minutes from the school. She used one of her green gloves to wipe some snow from a park bench. Once a spot was cleared Misty sat on the bench lowered her head and began to cry. She was still very upset by the way Linda Saunders had been talking about her. When Misty looked up there was a bright sun out that enhanced the beauty of the snow covering the branches of the trees. Misty was startled when she felt two hands on her shoulders. She turned around to see Peyton Ramparts and Sabrina Davis.

“Are you skipping gym class too?” Sabrina asked.

“I tried to go to gym class but I’m very sorry that I did,” Misty said starting to weep again.

Peyton looked Misty on the eye and said, “So tell us what happened.” He started using one of his black gloves to clear enough room for he and Sabrina to sit down.


images 2

Episode 3 of Chaos by Ken David Stewart

Episode 3 of Chaos:

To Roger’s delight and with the help of drinking Valentus coffee, going for daily bike rides and going for regular workouts at Shapes gym, he was able to get his weight down to two-hundred thirty-five pounds. About a year ago Roger went to his doctor for a complete physical and weighed in at three hundred ten pounds. This was a turning point for Roger. He had been avoiding looking at himself in the mirror for quite some time now. Roger felt too much shame to see his reflection in the mirror. Although his present weight was still above his ideal weight according to the body mass index chart that his doctor showed him, Roger felt much better about himself. He could now look at himself in the mirror without fear of embarrassment. In fact, Roger thought that he now looked good. Not only had he lost a great deal of body fat he had regained a significant amount of muscle mass. Roger was now very proud of himself. With hard work he had achieved a major life goal. He now felt a lot more confident when he went out in public.

sofa-749629__180 1

Episode 45 of Winter Dreams by Ken David Stewart

Episode 45:

Misty arrived about ten minutes late for her afternoon gym class. She was finishing her cigarette at the smoking pod behind Maplewood Collegiate and was talking to a new girl who had just enrolled in the high school that day. While they were talking Misty lost track of the time. When Misty arrived at the lockers about five minutes late, the other girls were already in the locker room getting changed. Misty waited outside the entrance to the locker room and could hear the other girls talking. The girls’ voices were loud enough that Misty could overhear what they were saying. The dominant voice that drowned out the rest was that of Linda Saunders. Linda was a strong personality that attracted her own group of followers. At this very moment Linda was holding court with a group of four other girls. She had just overhead one of the other girls singing the praises of Rick Miller.

“Rick is such a great goalie. His play is the only reason that our hockey team is still competitive. I just hope that his injuries don’t keep him out of the line up too long. The Cougars have some key games scheduled for the next two weeks,” Sandra said.

“That’s for sure,” Tristan said. “I hate to say it, but I don’t have much confidence in Miles Meyers’ ability to lead the team.

Sandra and Tristan were so busy talking that they hadn’t noticed that Linda Saunders had walked up right behind them.





This Excerpt Has a Trailer Park Boys Ambiance

Act Eight Scene One:

Narrator: After a long afternoon drinking at Dusty’s Tavern, Lloyd decides to do the interview at the radio station.

Rick: Someone’s knocking at the door, Dwight. You get it.

Dwight: Why not? I’m only the co-host of the show after all.

Narrator: When Dwight lets Lloyd in he can see that Lloyd is not too steady on his feet.

Rick: You look pretty drunk, Lloyd. Are you sure that you can do the interview?

Floyd: Damn right I can. I only drank about six Bud. Anyway, you guys are going to be famous worldwide after this interview.

Dwight: Lloyd we know that the Andy Griffin Show is popular in Roswell but I don’t think too many people have heard about it anywhere else.

Floyd: I didn’t come here to talk about the damn Andy Griffin Show.

Rick: What?! Look Lloyd, the Andy Griffin Show was the top-rated show in Roswell last year and that’s what our listeners expect you to
talk about.

Dwight: What else would you talk about? Cutting hair or playing checkers?

Lloyd: You’re one funny boy, Dwight. Let me first tell you guys why you don’t want me to talk about the Andy Griffin Show. Andy Griffin can’t even remember his lines for the show even when he’s sober.
Dwight: Hang on for a few minutes Lloyd. Our listeners want to hear some more from Mick Russell’s story.
Mick: I need to apologize to Rick,Dwight and their audience,
Dwight: Why’s that Mick?
Mick: Well, when I told you guys about finding the strange pieces of metal on the property, I exaggerated a little bit.
Rick: Exaggerated how?
Mick: Well guys, a flying saucer really didn’t crash on my ranch last night. Like I said earlier, I got a little carried away. I’ve been having a hard time lately. My wife left me because I wasn’t making enough money to keep the ranch going. So I got up in the morning, feeling very sorry for myself and started drinking. Then I start getting real lonely so I went down to Dusty’s Tavern to have some company. I had quite a few beers while I was at Dusty’s. My guess is that the alcohol clouded my judgment. When I got to the radio station I convinced myself that I’d seen pieces of a flying saucer on my ranch.
General Kane and Private Enns drove me back to the ranch and showed me what really fell on my ranch. It was a weather balloon. My conscience started to bother me so I figured I better get down to the radio station and tell everyone the real story. I’m sorry if I upset anyone.

Dwight: Mick, we didn’t smell alcohol on your breath when you were here before.

Rick Yeah, and why are you sweating so much Mick?

Dwight: I think maybe those Air Force guys put some heavy pressure on you to change story.

Lloyd the Barber: So do I.

Rick: Why do you say that Lloyd?

Lloyd: Because I drew a picture that proves that Mick is telling the truth.

Narrator: Lloyd shows his drawing to Rick and Dwight.

Rick: What is it, Lloyd?

Floyd: It’s a picture of a creature from outer space.

Dwight: Lloyd, you probably copied this picture out of a comic book.

Floyd: Okay, here’s my story. This afternoon I was at Dusty’s Tavern having a few beers. When I was there I spotted my old girlfriend, Jane sitting there with Dennis, the new town mortician. I hid behind a
fake palm tree and got close enough to hear what they were saying. Jane is a nurse at the Roswell Hospital. She was telling Dennis that she was in the operating room when the surgeons were performing an autopsy on a dead alien. Dennis the mortician asked her to draw a picture of the creature that she saw. While I was hiding behind the palm tree I sketched the picture of my shirt sleeve. Right after that I had to sneeze. That’s where you see the green splotch on the picture.
Narrator: Dwight shows the drawing on his sleeve to Rick, Dwight and Lloyd.
Dwight: I’m glad you told us you sneezed on the picture. If I didn’t know that it was a glob of snot I would have thought that the alien was literally a little green man. Ha! Ha!

Rick: You weren’t kidding Lloyd. This is an amazing story.

Dwight: What do you remember about Dennis and Jane’s conversation?

Floyd: I remember Nurse Jane saying that there were some surgeons working on the alien while a photographer was in the room taking page

pictures. She also said there was a cameraman shooting film with a 16mm Bell and Howell camera. Jane said she had to leave the room because she was feeling sick to her stomach. She said that the smell in the operating room was absolutely horrible.

Dwight: Was it anything like the smell in the washroom at Moe’s Garage?

Floyd: That’s exactly what she compared it to.

Rick: Whoa! That is bad. The last time I was in the washroom at Moe’s Garage I felt like I was going to puke.

Narrator: The phone starts ringing in the control room. Dwight picks up the phone.

Dwight: Listeners, we have Moe Miller, the owner of Moe’s Garage on the line.

Moe: What’s this I hear about a filthy, smelly washroom at Moe’s Garage?

Lloyd: You been in there recently, Moe? The odor is disgusting.

Moe: You want to know what’s really disgusting Lloyd?

Lloyd: What?

Moe: Your acting. You have the gall to come on the show and insult a great actor like Andy Griffin while you can’t act worth a hill of beans yourself.

Rick: Come on, boys. This is starting to get personal.

Dwight: That’s right Rick. I think that we should ask the listeners to get their children to stay out of the room while this segment of the show is running.

Rick: Dwight’s right, listeners. The content on tonight’s show is getting pretty intense. This might be a good time to send your kids out to the barn to do a few chores.

Dwight: In fact, listeners it’s time to cut to a commercial from tonight’s sponsor Moe’s Garage, where your car gets fixed right at a fair, honest price.

Moe: How dare you run my commercial now? You just finished slandering the reputation of Moe’s Garage.

Rick: Well, you’re paying for the commercial airtime whether we run it or not Moe.

Moe: What?! Who do you think is going to come to my garage now that they’ve heard that my washroom is filthy?

Dwight: Everybody, Moe. You got the only service station within fifty miles of Roswell.

Moe: All right, run the damn commercial then!

Narrator: The phone in the radio station starts ringing once again. Dwight takes a call from Dennis the mortician.

Dwight: Listeners, we now have Dennis the mortician on the line. Have you got any interesting comments or questions for us this evening, Dennis?

Dennis: You bet I do. First of all get that yahoo, Lloyd the Barber, off of your show. He’s a drunk, an idiot and a D rate actor.

Lloyd the Barber: So you’re the guy who’s been putting the moves on my girlfriend, Nurse Jane!

Dennis: First of all Lloyd, she’s your ex -girlfriend. She told me that she has no more interest in you whatsoever. Furthermore, you need to stop stalking her.

Lloyd: What do you mean stalking her?

Dennis: Well, what do you call hiding behind a fake palm tree and eaves- dropping on our conversation at Dusty’s Tavern?

Lloyd: That’s not stalking. I was just trying to find out if she was really dating a bozo like you.

Rick: Listeners, once again we’re advising you to send your children out to the barn to do some chores at this time. Some listeners may find the following comments to be very offensive.

Dwight: That’s right. Our show is supposed to be family friendly. Thanks to our guests and callers tonight it’s more like a third rate Jerry Springer show.

Narrator: The phone rings once again in the control room. This time Jerry Springer is on the line.

Jerry Springer: So what’s wrong with the Jerry Springer show? If you guys had 1% of the audience my show has you wouldn’t have to live in a trailer park.

Rick: How do you know that Dwight and I live in a trailer park?

Jerry Springer: Because some of the guests on my show are your neighbors.

Dwight: Well listeners, that’s about all we need to hear from Jerry Springer this evening. We have some important questions to ask Dennis the mortician and Mick Russell.

Rick: That’s right. Dennis, what do you make of Lloyd’s story about the conversation that he overheard?

Dennis: Well, I hate to admit it, but basically it’s true. What Lloyd reported is what Nurse Jane told me.

Dwight: Did you believe her?

Dennis: Of course, she’s my girlfriend.

Floyd: Your girlfriend?! You admit it! That’s all I wanted to find out.

Rick: Boys, we’re not really interested in this love triangle. What we need to know is about this alien in the operating room.

Dwight: Hold on Rick. We have another caller on the line. He says he’s a university professor.

Rick: Hello sir. What university are you from and what is your specialty?

Prof. Stone: My name is Dr. Meredith D. Stone. I’m the Department Head of Archeology at the University of New Mexico.

Rick: What’s your take on tonight’s discussion sir?

Dwight: Yes, who do you think is really telling the truth? Mick
Russell, Lloyd the Barber or Dennis the mortician?

Professor Stone: I don’t know about Mr. Russell’s story. His story about a weather balloon sounds like a government cover-up to me, but I do believe that Lloyd and Dennis are telling the truth.

Dwight: Why do you say that?

Prof. Stone: Because I have seen the aliens with my own eyes.

Rick: What?! Where?!

Prof. Stone: Two days ago I took a group of my students on a field trip to search for dinosaur bones. While we were in the desert we found a crashed space craft that we could not identify. We also found three dead aliens and one that was still alive. And ambulance arrived on the scene shortly after. A paramedic and a firefighter were just about to take the surviving alien to the hospital when two Air Force
officials pulled up in their jeep.

Dwight: Whoa! Then what happened, Dr. Stone?
Floyd the Barber 1

Ken David Stewart’s Greatest Hits (Volume 1 Excerpt 17)

“Yeah I know what you mean,” replied Matt. “I mean I love cars and all that but not sure I want to dedicate my whole life fixing them either. I’m not so sure I’m going to stick with this trade.”
“Well, well my friend, it sounds like were both in the same boat. Remember four-thirty tomorrow at the gym.”
“I’ll be there.” replied Matt.
The next day the two friends met at the gym. They decided it was going to be their arms day. The two guys had advanced to the stage in their workouts where they specialize in one body part per day. When they had finished changing and got to the gym floor they headed straight for the biceps curl machine. As Mike was starting his first set of bicep curls, Matt noticed two guys they had seen before enter the gym. “Hey, Mike. Get a load of those two dudes who just came in.”
“What is this?A circus?” Mike observed.
The two new guys that walked in did appear to be a bit strange. One of them had blue hair styled like a Mohawk. The other one had short orange hair on his head but had a pointed green goatee for a beard. They were both big guys. The one with the blue Mohawk probably weighed about 260 pounds. The one with the short orange hair and pointed green goatee probably weighed in at around 280 pounds. The two new guys appeared to know what they were doing. They headed straight for the bench press. One of them started warming up with a 45 pound dumbbell in each hand. He began to do a set of dumbbell chest presses. Both Mike and Matt were impressed at the ease with which the Blue Hair lifted the dumbbells. At the end of his first set of ten repetitions there wasn’t a bead of sweat on him. He didn’t sound out of breath either.
“I wonder what those two guys do for a living or if they even have jobs,” queried Mike.
“Beats me but they probably don’t sell cars or life insurance,” Matt joked.
“Those two guys are really getting me curious,” said Mike. “What if we asked them what they do for a living after they’ve finished working out?”
“I just hope those two dudes are friendly,” laughed Matt.
wrestling cover 1

Revised Edition of The Lake Demon Chapter Ninety-Six

Chapter Ninety-Six
Robert Richard’s was proud of his son for earning a university degree and becoming a certified teacher. John was hired by a school district and taught at both the elementary and junior high levels for several years. John started to dislike his job more with each passing year. He finally became so stressed that he had to take a year’s leave of absence and go on long term disability. After his leave was over John made a decision not to return to full time teaching.
Over the next few years John tried out a series of new jobs attempting to make a career change. He had a succession of jobs including stints as a car salesman and various positions that primarily involved physical labor.
On an occupational level none of these jobs really worked out for John. Realizing that he was still two decades shy of retirement age John signed on with a school division as a substitute teacher. To supplement his meagre income John also worked part time at a group home. Although he didn’t consider this to be an ideal situation, he could live with it as he had found an avocation that he really enjoyed, that being writing fiction novels. John dreamed of one day having a successful self- supporting career as a professional writer.
John knew that his father was very disappointed that his son had for the most part left a respectable career as a teacher. He could not understand his son’s desire for a career as a writer. Robert knew that this was causing problems in John’s marriage and he wished that his son would give it up for the sake of his family if for no other reason. Robert thought that it was highly unlikely that John could ever make a decent living as a writer.
Picture 55